Kia Ora, I’m Alexa, and this is the story of why I am a Doula:

I’ve had a passion for birth and home birth for a long time. Even before I was pregnant I used to go to Mama and Baby groups in my local area, just so I could see what it was like to be a Mum. I wanted to be right up close to this thing I was dreaming of so much. I used to spend aaaaages studying natural birth, reading books and listening to podcasts so I could absorb all the information I could about Birth, so I could be as prepared as possible when it was my turn.

They say a passion is something you can’t stop talking about, thinking about, reading about, and Birth is certainly this for me!

One day, it was my turn, and I could barely believe it, I was pregnant! My long- awaited baby was coming! This threw me even deeper into my study, spending every spare moment researching more and more.

My own Birth came to me in a dream. It was one of those, half-awake, half-asleep kind of dreams and I saw myself giving birth, outside, under a big old oak tree.

I trusted that this subconscious vision was my birth plan and began to organize my own Sacred Birth Space.

The tree was already there, right outside my Yurt, covered in tiny buds of new leaves ready for Spring. It was as if it was getting ready for what was to come.

In my dream, I gave birth in water so I purchased a gorgeous, round, second-hand pool. Nature was to have a large part in my birth so the pool was filled with rain water and heated with fire on the morning of my birth.

Later that evening, after five hours in the bath, my daughter was born.

Wild and free.

Under a tree.

Amidst nature.

It was just as my intuition had promised and just as I trusted.

And this ignited my passion to help other women have empowered and autonomous births.

But the story doesn’t end there.

The days of early motherhood are some sort of beautiful blur to me.

I remember the feel,

I remember the smell.

I remember being overwhelmed with both love and exhaustion...

…..but what it actually looked like?

I don’t really remember that.

Amidst the sleep deprivation and feeding and snuggling and bathing and baby watching I would often forget to ask for the moments to be captured on camera.

When I did take photos, it was me capturing the moments I could see, not capturing the moment I experienced personally.

And just like that, my early motherhood moments are not captured in time, but instead are a jumble of puzzle pieces I so often try and piece back together but can’t because some are missing.

I don’t want you to have this same problem.